Candor

As a child, this was not seen as a quality at all. I was loud. I was wrong. My dad told me to perch somewhere and be still. My inner "Frank" was not heard. Although I am not sure telling a woman her hair was ugly, or sticking my tongue out at people was a good quality. My candor results in less friends and lovers. Sometimes my intuition needs to listen and not jump into the opinion voice so fast. I am who I am. That's a cop-out! I am who I am, but I know who I am. I also know I can find everything wrong with someone, before one thing is right. You see, as a a little girl and teen, I was not free. I never felt free. I was given more insults than affirmations. My freedom was in my head. In there, my thoughts were safe. Nothing lasts forever though and I get bored. I get bored with my own thoughts. I read. I watch. I stare at people and their language. I am a mental stalker. I wonder why people are who they are. I know why I am the way I am. I can be an open book, but my heart has a little girl's diary. A mental diary is dangerous. It can be. It can also become a big girl's story. I hear "honesty is the best policy." Policies change like people do. Life ends though, but my story is just beginning.